It was year 1968, December 1968, after the war, a lot of things change. Well, maybe for me, I was a part of the military services during that time. And I guess I am pretty lucky, I was one of the survivors when a mortar attacked our camp.
It was Monday morning, first day to start something new. Since everything was a bit new, I saw something peculiar, rather someone peculiar. She seems on her 20’s, petite and wear ballet shoes. She was just standing in front of the train doors, not waiting for someone, nor trying to get in, just standing.
She was pointing her feet backwards and then forward. Staring at the ground and then looking at the sun. I didn’t bother to look at her anymore, so I rode at the train and noticed sadness in her eyes.
After a long day of work, I saw her again, standing at that same position. Waiting? Not waiting? I don’t know. What is wrong with her? I asked myself. Oh well, generation today, a bit weird, so strange. So I pass by her thinking she’s crazy, yes I know what a jerk am I? Maybe she’s just afraid of trains. Oh I’m so judgmental!
The next day, she was still there. But now, wearing a floral dress and her ballet shoes. I’m guessing she’s a ballerina, or maybe she just loves wearing those kind of shoes! Her aura was a bit different than yesterday. It was more joyful compare to what I saw in her eyes that day. Again, after a long day of work, she was there again, standing at that same position. NEVER MOVING.
Days and days had passed, she was still there. She never moved her spot. Just there, waiting, not waiting. I smiled, maybe she’s waiting for her boyfriend or maybe her boyfriend dumped her because she’s clingy. Good thing that the people don’t mind her at all. They pass by her thinking she’s just a living ghost.
Days become months, and she was still there. What is she thinking?
The rain is pouring so hard, she’s not even moving! I immediately put my umbrella out, “Ms. Are you crazy? Do you want to get sick? It’s raining so hard” I yelled, she didn’t bother to look at me but I guess she’s mute? She didn’t hear me and didn’t utter a word. Okay, I know over thinking?
Out of my curiosity, I stayed with her, old ladies started to talk about her. Again out of my curiosity, I’ve eavesdrop. “The reason, that girl never left that place is because her fiancé told her to wait for him till he comes back” said the old pretty lady “But the thing is, she couldn’t remember anything, what had happened in the present nor in the past. The only thing she could remember is to wait for her one true love” said the other pretty lady. What a very sad story, but how in the world could she know that years had passed?
I lay my back on the bench, so unfortunate. She lost all her memory except for that very moment. I guess it’s one of the happiest day of her life. Waiting for her man. But where is her man?
“I heard that her boyfriend didn't knew she had an accident, so both of them lived a different life” said the old pretty lady. Okay, that’s definitely unfortunate. Not knowing that the girl of your dreams had an accident and you never had a clue! That’s pretty weird! I bet he knows, he just gave up! With click of a hand she disappeared in front of me. So I ran to find her, where is she going? Good thing she didn’t went that far. I followed her. Not in a creepy stalker way but just simply following her.
After long hours of walk, she stopped to walk. My heart beats so fast, maybe she knew I was following her. So I stepped back, but she didn’t notice me at all, she just stood there, in front of a restaurant, a fine restaurant. In a glimpsed, her tears fell, I wanted to comfort her, but it’s just weird, comforting a stranger.
Again, out of curiosity, I slowly walk towards her and check out a sight of why she’s crying.
And there she was, staring at a couple, her hands stretching at the glass. She weep so hard that I couldn’t see her face anymore. I bet that guy is her boyfriend. What a jerk? How in the world does he not know that his girlfriend was in an accident. And what’s worse she left her with another woman.
She turned back, sat down slowly as she hit her head with her hands. I guess, it hit her, she may loss her memory but not the feeling. At that very moment, I felt pity on her. I don’t know her story or what’s she’s going through but those tears are just so sad. With all my guts, I offered my hand and gave her my handkerchief. When she looked at me, she seems a little bit shocked. She bowed her hand and said thank you. I laugh, “Well, you’re not mute after all” her tears still flowing from her cheeks. I smiled “Don’t cry, if you cry that much, you’re going to look like the old wicked witch of the west” she smiled at me a little bit startled and said “Thank you” without any further ado, she left. She was running so fast she dropped her bracelet. A broken shaped heart bracelet and that was the last time I saw her. I never saw that girl in the train station ever again.
December 1985, after how many years, the girl who still wears her Ballet Shoes, on that train station is once again standing in front of the train doors. But this time, she ride in.
I immediately followed her, “So who decided to ride on the train huh?” I said. She was a bit flustered when she saw me “Do you know me?” she asked. Oh well, someone who had lose her memory before may not have a sharp memory at all. But my heart beats so fast I don’t even know why. As I stare at her, everything went on slow motion. It’s like I’m inside a hypnosis and I can’t move a single muscle. There’s something strange about her, I think I know her but I don’t know where. Not because I saw her on the train station. This is the first time I ever lay my eyes on her, as in face to face.
They we’re high school sweethearts. They plan of living together as one before he went to the army. “Remember December, This is for you my love, the other half of my heart is here on your wrist, so you that you’ll feel that my heart beats only for you”
“But why just half?” she asked
“Because the other half is already trap in your chest” pointing on her chest. She smiled, as her tears fell from her chubby cheeks “Don’t cry, if you cry that much, you’re going to look like the old wicked witch of the west” she removed her Rosary bracelet and gave it to him “He would protect you all the time and I know He’ll lead you to me”. He gave her a hug, before he ride on the train, “Wait for me here, at this train station okay, and then we’ll go to our favorite restaurant and eat all the food we can eat okay! I love you!”
She kissed him goodbye, and it’s the last time she will ever see that face again.
A year after he went on a military service, a mortar attacked his camp leaving him comatose for a year and a half. She waited for him, but unfortunately he didn’t remember any of his past life. Not even she, the love of his life, all he could remember is his past life. As if all of his memories of her since they we’re teenagers we’re forever forgotten.
He left her without any trace. But she still waited, waited patiently that she almost gave up, but one night he came saving her.
“Do you remember me?” she asked me. I was just staring at her, the sadness had filled her eyes over again. “I’m Ella by the way, in case you see me again on the street don’t mind me at all okay” she smiled. Seeing her walk away hurts my heart so much, that my brain cells wanted to go out and call me stupid! I followed her “Ella wait!” she stopped. Slowly I walked toward her “I guess I remember” I said, showing the bracelet she left the last night I saw her “This is the half of my heart” wearing it to her “I will place it on your wrist so that you’ll feel my heart beats only just for you alone” I said, her tears fell “Why just half?” she asked “Because the other half is with you, and I guess that’s the reason why I wanted to stay with you because my heart knows you”
“In my head you’re just the girl in front of the train doors. But my heart keeps yelling at my brain that she’s the key to your heart” her tears fell again “Don’t cry, if you cry that much, you’re going to look like the old wicked witch of the west”
I put my sleeves up, “Look He’s guiding me onto you”
I don’t know how, I don’t know why, but I guess destiny had been a little bit cruel to the both of us, she didn’t know, I didn’t know. The stories about her losing her memory was actually my story. I was actually a jerk for running away. Staring at her eyes, I can say I am the luckiest man on earth to have her beside me all the time. She didn’t gave up on me. It’s funny that I can’t remember anything, but I remember the feeling I have when I said those words to her. I guess that it’s was a miracle for me and her.